I'm sure we've all heard HORROR stories about those groups of moms that take over Starbucks with their awful children, that are way too young to appreciate the simplicity and solitude of the Starbucks, and have quickly gone dashing out once we see them invading.
I am proud to say, I'm one of them.
I am a huge part of the playgroup scene. I love meeting other moms, having children for my kids to play with, and getting tons of new ideas for where to go and what to do on hot/rainy/snowy/boring afternoons.
I don't enjoy the cliques, the judgements or the policies. For this reason I'm usually the one who starts the groups, so I can run them fairly and MY WAY. I know many moms who do...and currently that's the clique I seem to belong to. The moms that volunteer to run groups so they can set things up the way they think they should be. Typically all inclusive, welcoming, and FREE; but there are always exceptions, as there are with anything. Sadly most of these groups die within a few months, mostly because not everyone sees eye to eye. A lot of the time its because they're so busy enjoying the friendships they made that plans are made via text or Facebook.
If you had not had the joys of scheduled group meetings there are many ways to find these clubs. Via internet is my favorite, Yahoo used to be a huge place for it, also the hospitals where you gave birth. I've also enjoyed a few MOPS meetings in my time (Mothers of PreSchoolers), which is a Christian organization. Some are focused less on the Christianity and more on the momminess; those are the ones I enjoy most. Library story times seem to be a group of their own, although its difficult to find those select few mom/kid sets you enjoy spending quality time with; but if you are lucky....you'll find a true gem.
I greatly encourage new moms (or old moms or just moved moms) to find a playgroup. Its great a great way to find a potential mommy soul mate. You can bug them for advice, go over to THEIR house (instead of sitting in your own), enjoy company with another adult, and the naps at the end are most often the best the kiddos will ever take.
I'm in the moment considering a revamp of an old group I once ran... I'll post a link later if it comes to fruition. I'm currently really enjoying the moms I have already picked up in these groups. I've even been lucky enough to have found a soul mate or two.
MOPS for those who may be interested.
Monday, March 3, 2014
Those First Timers
I am a Mom.
There are LOTS of things synonymous with motherhood; but if its your first time you feel so overwhelmed with the idea of it. Traditional? Organic? Cloth or disposable? Bottle or Breast? Stroller or sling? Up or down? Left or right......
I have a one year old, ChopChop. I also have an 11 year old, Bogger. Its basically starting over. Not that I don't "remember" baby times, but so much has changed. The sonograms aren't even the same anymore. Last time the baby was a general "blob" shape. This time we could tell she had HAIR!!!
I'm worried about why one of my kids is crying, and we think its teeth...and then why the other one is crying, might be her period. Boys and dating vs hitting and biting. As the saying goes...I didn't choose the thug life, the thug life chose me. Wait...that doesn't apply here, or does it....
Geek Dad and I have had struggles with infertility. We tried for 7 years for our second. We even attempted (and failed) at adoption. So we assumed it was never going to happen and went along with our life. 3 glorious years later, while house shopping for a home with acreage in the country, we found out ChopChop was on her way. We were elated...after properly accusing the doctor of having the wrong family and wrong room and insisting on a positive blood test first. A new baby!!! Bogger had been begging for her for years. We had cried and felt like the situation was final, and then BAM! baby. So the house search moved to the suburbs for us and a new life for us began.
After our initial concerns died down about health for the baby, making sure Bogger didn't feel left our or forgotten, the real fun began. The NOW WHAT phase of parenthood began. I had to restudy the books, I had to reread consumer reports on car seats, playyards (aka playpens 10 years ago!), toys, diapers, strollers.... the list never ended. I asked every one I knew everything I could think of. How old can she be before she has peanut butter? What about strawberries? YES...I KNEW she'd not be enjoying any of those things for some time, but it had changed so much!
A few things we knew for sure: Breast, no bottles. Disposable not cloth (I already hate laundry, why add extra poo?). Organic when we could. Stroller and sling, cause that's how we roll, we like options. Up and down, but right back up again cause they don't sleep for long periods at first. Left AND right cause there's a few of us here to handle all things. The most important thing I realized as a First Timer...for the second time, is that it was OUR choice and up to US. We could ask for advice, read books, but its our family and how we want to shape it. I think that's the best advice I can give to any First Timer... don't be afraid to do it your way. Not everyone fits a mold, not everyone hits those milestones exactly and no one has a manual...for a reason.
So we are like first timers again, but with two kids. I may get strange looks from time to time, I'm okay with that. I'm still eagerly awaiting the day my oldest gets asked how old HER baby is, imagining her face alone is worth it. I just can't wait to see what the future holds for all of us.
There are LOTS of things synonymous with motherhood; but if its your first time you feel so overwhelmed with the idea of it. Traditional? Organic? Cloth or disposable? Bottle or Breast? Stroller or sling? Up or down? Left or right......
I have a one year old, ChopChop. I also have an 11 year old, Bogger. Its basically starting over. Not that I don't "remember" baby times, but so much has changed. The sonograms aren't even the same anymore. Last time the baby was a general "blob" shape. This time we could tell she had HAIR!!!
I'm worried about why one of my kids is crying, and we think its teeth...and then why the other one is crying, might be her period. Boys and dating vs hitting and biting. As the saying goes...I didn't choose the thug life, the thug life chose me. Wait...that doesn't apply here, or does it....
Geek Dad and I have had struggles with infertility. We tried for 7 years for our second. We even attempted (and failed) at adoption. So we assumed it was never going to happen and went along with our life. 3 glorious years later, while house shopping for a home with acreage in the country, we found out ChopChop was on her way. We were elated...after properly accusing the doctor of having the wrong family and wrong room and insisting on a positive blood test first. A new baby!!! Bogger had been begging for her for years. We had cried and felt like the situation was final, and then BAM! baby. So the house search moved to the suburbs for us and a new life for us began.
After our initial concerns died down about health for the baby, making sure Bogger didn't feel left our or forgotten, the real fun began. The NOW WHAT phase of parenthood began. I had to restudy the books, I had to reread consumer reports on car seats, playyards (aka playpens 10 years ago!), toys, diapers, strollers.... the list never ended. I asked every one I knew everything I could think of. How old can she be before she has peanut butter? What about strawberries? YES...I KNEW she'd not be enjoying any of those things for some time, but it had changed so much!
A few things we knew for sure: Breast, no bottles. Disposable not cloth (I already hate laundry, why add extra poo?). Organic when we could. Stroller and sling, cause that's how we roll, we like options. Up and down, but right back up again cause they don't sleep for long periods at first. Left AND right cause there's a few of us here to handle all things. The most important thing I realized as a First Timer...for the second time, is that it was OUR choice and up to US. We could ask for advice, read books, but its our family and how we want to shape it. I think that's the best advice I can give to any First Timer... don't be afraid to do it your way. Not everyone fits a mold, not everyone hits those milestones exactly and no one has a manual...for a reason.
So we are like first timers again, but with two kids. I may get strange looks from time to time, I'm okay with that. I'm still eagerly awaiting the day my oldest gets asked how old HER baby is, imagining her face alone is worth it. I just can't wait to see what the future holds for all of us.
The First One
I
always have the hardest time with this first post. Its not that I don't
have anything to say, or any ideas on where to start or what I wish to
share, but its how to not overwhelm my brain, and yours. So there is
always that "First One" on blogs which are usually some type of
introduction as to where I hope to go from here...so I suppose I will do
just that.
Hello.
I am the HG or Head Geek around here. I am a wife, a mother, a daughter, a friend, a sister, and just a general all around Geek. I have two children (both girls), whose ages are 10 years apart (only 6 days away from a full decade to be exact) and we will refer to the oldest, now 11, as Bogger and the baby, age 1, as ChopChop.
I am also happily married to the love of my life, Geek Dad, who is a fantastic dad and provider for our family and allows me to stay at home for our kids and supports all my crazy ventures.
I am one of those general Geeks who celebrates all of my fandoms and shares with whomever is interested. I would like to think that I have some wisdom to share from my crazy life and a shoulder for those who may need it. I have recently begun standing up for myself and my beliefs, which is incredibly hard at times, but always rewarding. I believe in being open minded and open hearted and helping other as often as I can. I believe in (sometimes brutal) honesty and loyalty; but above all I believe in the power of family. The family is always a place where you SHOULD feel like you are accepted and loved; embraced BECAUSE of all of your faults and accomplishments. I know not everyone feels like this. I am one who doesn't; but as a parent with the special chance to have a family of my own and create those feelings for my children, and my husband, I am starting to every day.
This is the journey for us, the Geek Family. We have lived on both coasts of the U.S. and several places in the middle. We have had our series of ups and downs. We have struggled with money, fertility, family, and just life in general; but we are stronger.
These are my crazy rantings. My attempt to stand up for me... and hopefully encourage you to stand up for you too.
Welcome.
Hello.
I am the HG or Head Geek around here. I am a wife, a mother, a daughter, a friend, a sister, and just a general all around Geek. I have two children (both girls), whose ages are 10 years apart (only 6 days away from a full decade to be exact) and we will refer to the oldest, now 11, as Bogger and the baby, age 1, as ChopChop.
I am also happily married to the love of my life, Geek Dad, who is a fantastic dad and provider for our family and allows me to stay at home for our kids and supports all my crazy ventures.
I am one of those general Geeks who celebrates all of my fandoms and shares with whomever is interested. I would like to think that I have some wisdom to share from my crazy life and a shoulder for those who may need it. I have recently begun standing up for myself and my beliefs, which is incredibly hard at times, but always rewarding. I believe in being open minded and open hearted and helping other as often as I can. I believe in (sometimes brutal) honesty and loyalty; but above all I believe in the power of family. The family is always a place where you SHOULD feel like you are accepted and loved; embraced BECAUSE of all of your faults and accomplishments. I know not everyone feels like this. I am one who doesn't; but as a parent with the special chance to have a family of my own and create those feelings for my children, and my husband, I am starting to every day.
This is the journey for us, the Geek Family. We have lived on both coasts of the U.S. and several places in the middle. We have had our series of ups and downs. We have struggled with money, fertility, family, and just life in general; but we are stronger.
These are my crazy rantings. My attempt to stand up for me... and hopefully encourage you to stand up for you too.
Welcome.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)